Finding reverence in a giant pile of trash
Years ago, I made a rather silly claim that when I became an old woman I would spend my days picking up trash and pointing out the moon to people. I could see myself perfectly, doing exactly that. This January, while not yet being an old woman, I set an intention to walk in nature every day and to pick up trash during my walks. There would be plenty of moon sightings as well, with the month bookended by two full moons and even an eclipse.
It was a small goal, but quite meaningful to me. I invited others to join me and we picked up a lot of litter, especially along the Mississippi River. Litter is like laundry or dishes - there is always more to do, so you have to approach it with that mindset. Something you cleaned up yesterday will require a clean up again today. It's wonderful spiritual work for me, and a great meditation into finding compassion both for myself and for all the people leaving the litter behind. And for questioning how we live today and how we might live more in alignment with what we believe.
Do you feel that the world is at a turning point? That what we seemed to be able to get away with in the past is no longer working? That what we could turn away from before, no longer feels ok to ignore?
I have had the word "deepening" percolating throughout my intentions and journal writings for the past couple of years, and as the new year approached, I was excited to see the word in the musings of others in my circles. We are feeling the pull towards Deepening. What would that mean, to deepen? There's so much skimming on the surface, so much to attend to, so many distractions and requests for our eyes and ears. What does it look like to deepen? What would that mean for you? Would it mean slowing down? Letting go of some things to focus more intently on others? Setting down the technology? Taking a stand when you're usually quiet?
Two mornings ago, I woke up with another word floating in my dreaming/waking state: reverence. Reverence. How could I frame my life around reverence? I revere wild nature, freedom, balance, sustainability, kindness, peace. How am I living life to show that these are the things I revere?
What do you revere? Take a moment to consider.
We can find reverence as we pick up the trash - whether that's a metaphor, or a genuine action we're taking in the world.
One Word That Changed Things For Me And It's Not What You Think
We spent a beautiful Thanksgiving at the beach and at the beginning of the trip I asked for amessage of guidance. The next morning I woke up with the memory of one word:
Satisfied.
I was fascinated - why did this one word feel so good?
What if I went through the rest of the vacation allowing myself to feel satisfied in each moment? I had so much goodness around me - could I be satisfied? All weekend I kept repeating the word in my head. Satisfied. Satisfied. Satisfied. It felt so "just right" - not wanting or seeking, not overloaded with too much. Satisfied.
We are surrounded by so many messages, especially at this time of year, encouraging us that there's something more we need. Under no circumstances should we feel satisfied, ever. There's always more possibility, more potential, something bigger and better up ahead.
Our brains are actively scanning for the next thing. On our phones, on our computers, as we're driving or shopping. No sense of closure. No spot to mentally rest. So many demands on our attention and so many possible solutions to our dissatisfaction.
Have you noticed this too?
I've been continuing to play with the word "satisfied" now that I'm back home, and seeing how I can apply it to my actions, my state of being, my experiences.
What I'm describing sounds similar to a gratitude practice, but for me right now the word "satisfied" feels even more powerful than "grateful". We can be grateful about the absence of bad things. Satisfied implies that all is well.
It doesn't imply that there is no change coming - we can be satisfied with our approach to a problem, or satisfied with our desire for a change. It's different than contentment as well - we can be satisfied with our discontent, without needing to jump right away. Satisfied feels like a place to breathe.
I do have plans, things to be done, the tree is up but un-decorated, and there is much going on in my life as I'm sure there is in yours. I'm still making space, physically and mentally, for what I'd like to create in 2016.
But in the midst of the planning and the doing, wow - what a lovely thing to be satisfied with myself and where I am in the process of my life. To be satisfied with my efforts, with my approach - with what I get done and don't get done each day. To wake up satisfied, to go to sleep satisfied, to be satisfied with the arc of my experience- that just feels like peace.
If this feels intriguing to you, I encourage you to try it. Spend the rest of today and tomorrow feeling satisfied. See how that shifts your energy.
Stepping Beyond Your Fear
I stood alone at the base of the granite rock face. I’d hiked over 1,000 miles, but nothing I’d encountered was as challenging as the trail in Maine. I was more than a little afraid. If I was going to climb over this rock, then I would have to do it on my own.
I had come this far and I wasn’t going back. I took a breath, cinched my pack straps and folded my poles. Now, I could use my hands. I climbed forward, one foot at a time. I grabbed for roots when I could and I trusted my shoe wouldn’t slip on the tiny ledge of rock. Little by little I climbed, up and down, over and over. Twenty days later, I made it. I stood atop Mt. Katahdin, the highest point in Maine.
I had no choice but to pull myself out of my fear. Each time I find myself stuck in a scary place, I go back to that moment to rediscover how I can learn and grow.
Start with one small step. Let yourself make the smallest step you can. Confidence grows by taking action. Small steps over time add up. Once you’re moving you can make adjustments to your path.
Review your successes. Find the part of your problem that looks like something you’ve tackled before. When I gazed up that steep rock in Maine, I realized I had already learned everything I needed to know. I had climbed every mountain on the AT since I began the trail. Recognize how your accomplishments have given you the skills you need for your new challenge.
Widen your perspective. Back up and see the big picture. Whenever I reached a viewpoint on the trail, I stopped to see how far I’d come. Three summits away, I could see where I had breakfast. Step back from your project for a broader view. Even better, go for a walk to clear your head.
Envision the completion. Take a few minutes each day to envision everything working out perfectly. Be detailed and specific. Add in sights, sounds, smells, color and emotion. Relish the feeling of success. I pictured standing at that Katahdin sign many times when I was still huddled in my tent miles and miles away. Allow yourself to savor the moment. Then get back to your journey.
Gather your allies. Ask for help from those who know you best. They’ll remind you why you’re meant to achieve the goals you’ve set. The support I received via letters, calls and Facebook messages from friends and family during my 2,000 mile journey was invaluable. Your friends and allies will give you energy and renew your hope. They see your capabilities and believe in you.
When you’re facing a challenge, know your fear will not disappear. Once you realize this truth, you will be free to move forward and accomplish your goals. Georgia O’Keefe said it best:
“I’ve been absolutely terrified every moment of my life and I’ve never let it keep me from doing a single thing that I wanted to do.”
Craving company during the holidays? 7 ways to be merry with others
It's the most social time of the year and you're home with your houseplant. Are you away from family and friends, maybe in a new city? Are you feeling lonely, bored, or antsy? Do you gain most of your your energy from time with people? Here are seven quick tips when you need the company of others during the holidays.
1. Scan Meetup groups, Facebook events, or your local newspaper. In the social media era, there are always so many cool things going on and they're easier and easier to find! Don't be afraid to go alone - you'll surely meet some kindred spirits to conspire with!
2. Volunteer. Soup kitchens. Homeless shelters. Old folks homes. There's no better cure for solo ennui than striking up a conversation with someone who could really use the company. Be present and compassionate for others and feel your spirits lift!
3. House sit for someone with a dog, and head to a dog park. Meet other friendly dog people and enjoy the romping excited energy of happy pups! Or just volunteer to take a busy friend's dog out for the afternoon.
4. Create your own random kindness activity. Hand out candy canes or flowers. Write sweet notes and pass them out. Bake cookies and set up a "free cookie table" at a nearby park. Be creative. Maybe someone will video you, it will go viral and you'll end up with a spot on the Today Show! :)
5. Go to a class. Fitness. Yoga. Pottery painting. Cooking. There are so many fun ways to hang out with others and learn something too.
6. Make your own party, large or small. Invite new friends to a cookie baking party. Or a wine tasting, or holiday card writing. Or Netflix watching. Or something else you love but would love to do with someone else. Ask one or two people to join you for breakfast, lunch, coffee, a walk, or your other favorite thing. It's really common for people to assume that everyone else is busy during the holidays, but it's not true! Ask and you'll be surprised who's also looking for company!
7. Just open up and smile. Strike up conversations with strangers. It's amazing how people want to share but don't always perceive the invitation. Be a good listener. When you find someone whose personality resonates with yours, stick around.
If you're new to town or just finding yourself on your own it's easy to believe that everyone else is already set with a scintillating social life and no room for you. But the truth is there are plenty of other people out there looking for something fun and happy to do with someone kind and pleasant - you!
And if some of your invitations and welcoming overtures are turned down, that's ok! Don't let one"No, I can't make it this weekend" mean anything except that person is busy, tired, or maybe trying to get some down time - see link below!
Need quiet time during the holidays? 9 ways to get some space.
Are you an introvert who plays an extrovert on TV? Or are you simply a straight-up introvert? Try these tips when you need a break from the parties, the football games, the relatives, and the crowds.
1. Offer to house sit. Then you can go to someone else's empty home and visit with their cat or plants or whatever you're watching. You'll have an oasis of quiet and you can get away any time by simply exclaiming, "Oh! I just remembered! I need to go to _______'s house and feed their bird/cat/iguana/boa constrictor."
2. Take a walk. Before or after a meal, at half time, in the morning, at sunset - these are all great times to say, "I'm going out for a walk. I'll see y'all in about a half hour or so." If people want to join you and you'd prefer to be completely alone, explain that you'll be doing a silent walking meditation. Which brings us to a wonderful alone-time option:
3. Meditate. Sometimes people understand "I'm off to do my daily meditation" better than "I really need some alone time." So whether you have a rich and fulfilling meditation practice or not, you can go to a room, close the door, and be by yourself, whether you're silently chanting a mantra or just relaxing with your thoughts.
4. Nap. Jet lag. General holiday exhaustion. Getting over a cold or the flu. A late night of partying. There are so many reasons to offer why you might need to spirit yourself away for a delicious restorative nap. If you're not tired but just want to be alone, you can bring a magazine or book under the covers with you. Holidays are made for napping. Find your favorite cozy spot and prioritize the daily holiday nap.
5. Go running. If you're an athlete, there's nothing like a solo run to clear your head and give you space for yourself. Pop in your favorite tunes, put on your headphones and hustle out the door. Or choose to take in the sounds of nature - breezes through the branches, rustling leaves, crunching frost underfoot- you'll be restored in no time!
6. Volunteer to go to the store for the last minute grocery items/batteries/baked goods/whatever. Sure, you'll have to brave the crowds, but you don't have to interact with strangers except to smile peacefully, so it's almost like being on your own! Then take an extra detour on the way home, stop at a park or a view-- or just sit in the parking lot! - and enjoy five or ten minutes of quiet for yourself.
7. Take a long bath. Add a lot of bath salts. Light some candles. Climb in and close your eyes. Ahhhh.
8. Go to a museum, house of worship or other quiet indoor space. If you're in a place where temps are below freezing, you can get your alone time inside. Even in the most crowded museum in New York City, you'll find rooms and galleries where there's hardly a soul. Relax on a bench and stare at a painting for 20 minutes. Or go to a place of worship, light a candle and sit in silent contemplation.
9. Just stay home. There's no rule that says you have to attend every social event that's available. If you're 18 or over, even if you feel social pressure to be everywhere, know that you have all the choice in the world to do what you really want. Take advantage of that. Unplug your phone, disconnect your computer, make some tea or hot cocoa and curl up with a good book. If you need to, tell folks you'll be out of town. Then stay put and enjoy. Ahhh.